Be Healed!

I attend a Bible study once a week. I enjoy it and look forward to it. It’s a great group of ladies and it helps me to stay disciplined about getting in the Word and having my socks blown off. We are reading through the book of John right now and our discussions are led by what impacted us in our time reading.

The subject of healing came up today as a result of the reading. My group leader and one other gal in our group of nine has an inkling of the state of my health. Part of today’s group discussion went something like this, “You know, healing is a choice. You have to choose to be healed.” Heads nodded around the table. “People get so comfortable being ill that they aren’t allowing God to heal them.” I didn’t say anything.

This may be true for some people. But blanket statements about healing hurt my feelings. I wanted to say, “I have worked my butt off and given up SO MUCH to care for my body and attempt to restore my health. Walk a day in my body with my pain and tell me it’s something you can get “comfortable” with.” I have refused to give up on my body (despite continued setbacks) and I have prayed with my face to the ground in total submission of His will and plan for my life. But here we are ladies and gentlemen, I’m still rockin’ a disease. And I am not any less of a person or a Christian because of it.

I know I’ve said it before, but my heart is heavy, so here it comes again. It is very difficult at times to be a Christian, have a chronic disease and be transparent with people. You can take away my belief in God and the same applies. It is difficult to have a chronic disease and be transparent with people. Simply because we all judge each other. When you add the fact that I am a Christian, you add another layer of judgement–healing comes into play from a God perspective.  It is unfortunate that it can make being real with people difficult and uncomfortable because of the association healing, prayer and faith have. And the way I’ve been made to feel is if you ain’t healed, when then by golly you must not be praying enough or getting right with God. I say, not true and don’t let it hinder going deeper with God or the people that do accept that you have done and are doing all that you can do to make your body right. It is especially disheartening when judgement is passed by someone who doesn’t know me very well or have a clue what God is doing in my life.

During the time that I was sick recently, I was on the phone with the mother of my son’s friend.  She knew I wasn’t feeling well. She doesn’t know me all that well, but knows a bit about my life. She wrapped up our conversation by saying, “You know, 70% is spiritual!” I had a moment where I thought–did she really just say that to me?

Fortunately, I am secure in who I am, who my Maker is and what His plan is for me. It is good!


It’s About Time Already

I have had blogger housekeeping to do (which has fallen by the wayside lately, much like my own housekeeping at home). I have needed to sit down and write because my sweet girlfriend, Lana at Living it, Loving it awarded me with the One Lovely Blog Award and The Versatile Blogger Award many moons ago. Thank you so much, Lana. There’s nothing like a little love to make your day. It’s humbling, to say the least, to be acknowledged by an incredible blogger. A cherished reminder to me of how blessed I have been by connecting with a group of people struggling with chronic illnesses that are intelligent, creative, inspiring and down right determined. I no longer feel alone and isolated because of what is going on with my body. And I have been so touched by the fact that others have taken the time to read about what is going on in my little corner of the world. Thank you with all my heart to everyone that has offered an encouraging word, a virtual hug or a smile.

I am supposed to display the One Lovely Blog Award. Tada!

The One Lovely Blog Award requirements:

* Display the award.

* Award fifteen others and let them know about it.

I went to my blog roll and counted my brothers and sisters and discovered there were thirteen. I’d like to acknowledge these thirteen, if that’s ok.

And here is the The Versatile Blogger Award. I love green.

The Versatile Blogger Award requirements:

* Recognize the person or people who gave you the award.

* Award fifteen others that you have recently discovered and think are fantastic!

* Share seven things about yourself.

I would also like to award the thirteen brothers and sisters in my blog roll with this award. You are all fantastic!

So without further ado, a few words about the stellar group of people whose blogs have deeply touched my life. Thank you to the heavens. You inspire me, encourage me, educate me, and cause laughter and tears. “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17

  • ∞ itis You were one of the first to reach out to me when I began blogging. I am so grateful. You are my hero–you eat from your own garden and knit your own socks from yarn from your own animals–how awesome is that? You have organized a medical notebook that is nothing short of inspiring. And you keep your blog so incredibly current. Your site is always a welcome and enjoyable place to stop and read.
  • Confessions of an RA Superbitch SuperBitch, what can I say? You really are a blogging rockstar in my book. : ) Simply love the brutal honesty. But you are also as sweet as they get. You are my alter ego. Never stop “bringing it”! Your posts are the ones I read out loud to my husband and relate to so often. Thank you for also being such a wonderful friend. Takes a huge load off when you can share with someone.
  • Dual Sport Life You are the first brother to leave a comment on my blog. Thanks, Terry! You represent the male front beautifully as a husband and also as a father. I’m so glad to have met you.
  • Letters From the Breach Kris, I’ve missed your posts and often wonder how you are doing. Your writing is gifted and often poetic. I still remember the first post of yours that I read. It created such a clear picture in my mind of you as a child in the moment you were describing. Please let us know how you are doing when you can.
  • Living it, Loving it Lana, you knock it out of the ballpark over and over and over. I honestly don’t know how you do it. You are an amazing blogger and advocate. You share the good, the bad, the ugly and everything in between. I love stopping by and delving into your posts. Thank you for being such an incredible source of information, for sharing your heart and your life with others, and making yourself available.
  • Living with Rheumatoid Arthritis An incredible source of medical information. Thank you for the time your take to provide links to current information and for blogging with integrity. I appreciate so much that you have shed some light on an antibiotic protocol as an option and provided a pingback to my AP diary. I have learned so much from you.
  • Pollyanna Penguin’s RA Blog You are one of the first RA bloggers I found. I love reading about your life experiences mingled with RA and all of it’s glory. Your stories and attitude always bring a smile to my face.
  • RA (Rheumatoid Arthritis) Sucks I keep checking on you. I miss your posts. You are also one of the first RA bloggers I stumbled upon. I remember reading post after post of yours one night. Love your writing style and your no excuses attitude. Tell it, sister.
  • Remicade Dream I clearly remember reading post after post of yours one evening as well. I literally laughed out loud and cried. Reading some of your posts felt like reading my own thoughts. I remember thinking, wow, I’m seeing what I’ve been feeling articulated on the screen. Suddenly, my thoughts were no longer just a voice in my head, but emotions that someone else had wrestled with. Thank you for being honest and real.
  • RheumaBlog I see your kind and encouraging words on several of the blogs I read and have found comfort in your posts. I love that you appreciate the simple things and find joy in things often overlooked by others.
  • Rheumatoid Arthritis Guy Definitely another rockstar in my book. (How ironic that the two rockstars on my list are also blogging super heros.) I have looked to your blog for many reasons, many nights and have found comfort and rest. I admire your enduring and optimistic spirit, love your guest posts and the responses you receive from all over the world. Thank you so much for sharing my blog with others. I have to wonder if you’ve ever stopped by. : )
  • Southern Gal with RA Leslie, you have been an incredible catalyst for change for me and a source of hope. Your blog brought about AP awareness for me in a whole new way. And girlfriend, I am seeing significant improvements now! Thank you so much for for taking a chance with AP, sharing your experience, and your knowledge. I thank God for you.
  • The Life and Adventures of Cateepoo Cathy, my all natural sister. : ) I love visiting your blog. It’s like reading a really good book with a big, fuzzy blanket on a chilly day–cozy and comforting. I adore the stories of your children and identify so strongly with your struggles to avoid pharmaceuticals and lead a healthy life. Thank you for letting us into your life and sharing your family with us.

And now, seven things about myself:

1. I am a sinner saved by a grace that is freely given. I asked the Lord into my life and received this grace and the assurance of salvation in heaven when I was 24 years old, and I’ve never been the same since. He gives me joy, He gives me strength, He gives me peace. He is an awesome God that loves and adores me despite my flaws and failures. What else could a girl ask for? But don’t get me wrong, I’m no Christian prude. I still like to have a good time.

2. I was once married to a man that was abusive in more ways than one. (Not everyone knows this about me. See what you guys bring out of me?) Divorce was never in my vocabulary and I was blinded by legalism–so I stayed in a unhealthy marriage for far too long. I am now married to a man that treats me like a princess. He took an incredible leap of faith when he married a girl with three boys. We met through e-harmony and had a long distance relationship for almost three years before getting married. We call our sweet little one an e-baby.

3. I got my degree in fine arts from UT Austin. Love the urban, hippy culture there and all things creative and inspiring. I love to draw and create jewelry. I had aspirations of becoming a college art teacher. God had other plans and I’ve been a stay at home mom since the day my first son was born. Can’t imagine life any other way.

4.  I love to dance. You name it–salsa, swing, two-step, waltz–love it! I also love getting my groove on to any kind of music you can dance to. I’m a wife and mommy now, so that doesn’t EVER happen in a club scene anymore. But I have to give a shout out to my sis for hooking me up the night of my bachelorette party! Good times…

5. I love the store Anthropologie. I’m crazy in love with their clothes and housewares. Love the vintage and unique look to many of their items gathered from around the world. If I could have a shopping spree anywhere–that would be the place.

6. I love documentary movies. I am game for just about any subject matter. Supersize Me is one of my favorites.

7. I was a health nut that loved to exercise on a regular basis before I was diagnosed with a chronic illness. Now I’m a health freak that admittedly can drive my family crazy sometimes. It is soooo hard to watch my husband and children eat things on occasion that I know are downright awful for them. And when I see people at the grocery store that are elderly or have young children with carts full of–pardon me–crap–it really breaks my heart. I just want to stop and tell them how awful the things in their cart are for them. But hey, I still drink coffee and eat chocolate and ice cream. Delicious. So, who am I to talk?

And that’s a little about me. A million blessings to all of you!